Rhys's Pieces

I have always marvelled how easy something appears when we operate from the point where competence and comfort are in harmony.

What will take three minutes of your time to read, reflect thoughts taking shape over many hours. Like starting a colt, writing can put me outside my comfort zone, so I take a deep breath, clear my thoughts and see what happens.

Details that hold us back are far more about our internal editor than others perception. In learning how the pieces make up the parts I am seeing how to learn, share and grow .... with grace.

Can you identify an action that triggered a personal learning? A moment that provided a different perspective? I introduced Rhys a couple of months ago, a three year old colt that joined the herd this summer. While our conversations are silent, they have opened a whole new level of awareness on observing horse behaviours and changed my perspective on a conversation.

A conversation can be a discussion where opinions are presented with a goal to make a decision, or force an opinion or it can include dialogue. Dialogue happens when different views are presented as a means to a new understanding. It stands to reason then, non-verbal communication is very much part of either a dialogue or a discussion. If that is the case, then starting a colt is in fact a process of dialogue.

A horse's natural instinct is to react, flee any perceived danger. So as the trust in our relationship has grown so too has the level of dialogue. Rhys is more willing to express his opinion on a situation rather than leave. As I see where the offer differs from a reaction it allows us to align and function together, just as a team begins to gel when there is a common purpose, vision and understanding.

In The Fifth Discipline, Senge suggests "In a dialogue people become observers of their own thinking. In dialogue a 'kind of sensitivity' develops that goes beyond what is familiar." Rhys and I are gaining that sensitivity and awareness of and for each other.

A dialogue allows ideas to grow through participation and differing opinions. Dialogue, is playful. So rather than time with Rhys being an effort they have become an opportunity to engage.

Indeed many of our conversations include an opinion I'd like Rhys to agree with, but rather than getting him to comply I try and present each action as another way to include him. A horse can be there physically but mentally they don't show up when they get pushed out of the learning zone. They may simply be going through the motions.

Fortunately Rhys hasn't been in complete opposition to my suggestions. But I do believe I have engaged him in the process of learning together as he now nickers when I approach and no longer hesitates before allowing me into his space.