Finding Holes

It would be great if success in life was achieved by following three steps, four rules or even the eleven things you must know. But life isn't simple and it is often the smallest of details that trip you up, when you miss the obvious.

As an autistic person, learning to cope with the world she lived in, Temple Grandin was aware of that disconnect when she wrote, "we see the world in color, animals see in detail". The obvious part of that statement is that animals also don't miss details. Such was the case when I discovered a hole in Rhys' training.

I am the first to admit that Rhys has pushed me out of my comfort zone, tested my knowledge, skill and abilities beyond any horse I have had the pleasure to meet. He scrutinizes my leadership and constantly checks my confidence and emotions.

I can only guess that I had an air of hesitation that fine Friday morning when Rhys let me know his perspective on our relationship was a little shaky. As well as seeing the detail, a horse's vision is very different from ours, so you can't assume that what a horse sees out of one eye will be perceived to be the same to him out of the other.

All was going well that morning, until I unexpectedly lurched into his right line of vision after he made a rather abrupt response to my request to turn left. His shift in weight unseated me and my sudden appearance on his right side surprised him, he bolted and was literally running for his life.

Despite all my preparations from the ground, the fence and onboard his back. I had missed a spot in his training which became a gaping hole that day. He left me in the dust.

Bruised but not ready to give in I hauled Rhys down to visit someone with a few more rides under his belt than I, Keith Stewart. I needed Rhys to be a contributing member of the team and we had come too far to leave Rhys out on pasture while my body and ego healed.

Within moments of Keith stepping into the round pen with Rhys I saw what I had lacked in my leadership. In my efforts to be a fair leader I had become cautious, Rhys had interpreted my actions as someone he couldn't rely on. What Rhys needed from me was someone he could absolutely count on through confident assertiveness.

Keith's perspective on what is fair gave me a whole new interpretation on how I needed to manage myself in Rhys' presence. Fairness is about both parties showing up equally, contributing and recognizing effort. What I learned with Rhys I now recognize show's up as small holes in other horses. The details are different and while I can manage the various idiosyncrasies of each horse just fine, they become bigger problems when other people get to share the space with them. That is what I've been working on this summer, finding and fixing the holes in my leadership. So when my team shows up they are ready, willing and able to help others find the gaps in theirs.